While many people can offer good ideas for a first date, learning how to obtain a date in the first place is the most critical step. Whether you're interested in a companion for a special occasion or looking for someone to develop a lasting relationship with, key elements in finding a date include advertising, experimentation, and follow-through.
Steps in How to Find a Date
You cannot find a suitable date just by approaching someone out of the blue, but at the same time extensive study and match-making may prove to be far more effort than what you're interested in. Following the proper steps for how to find a date will help improve your chances of meeting someone who matches your interests and is willing to develop a compatible relationship.
Decide Where You Want to Find Someone
Where to look for a date depends on your circumstances and why you are interested in companionship. For example, if you only need a companion for a special event (a wedding, company party, family reunion, etc.), it may be possible to approach coworkers or casual friends with the invitation. If, on the other hand, you are interested in a more serious commitment, you will need to look for someone who can be more than a general friend.
The best places to look are locations that closely match your primary interests.
Dating websites and online dating services often ask a series of questions about your hobbies, personality, and preferences in order to match you with a similar individual. If you have specialized needs, such as interracial preferences or you are a senior citizen, there are customized locations that can incorporate that information as well to help you find that special someone.
Friends and Family
Other options for finding a date include spreading the word to your friends and family and inviting blind date setups or even placing a personal ad in order to let others know that you are interested in meeting people.
Clarify Your Intentions
When you first start to look for a date, be very clear about your intentions. Do you want a committed love relationship that may develop into marriage, or are you just looking for a friend to go to sporting events with? Misleading people is not a viable tactic for how to find a date - instead, it will ultimately lead to resentment and a bitter relationship, or perhaps no relationship at all. Furthermore, be sure to be specific and honest about your preferences, including likes and dislikes, how you feel about long term relationships, and what your attitude toward dating and sex may be. By being forthright from the beginning you stand a much better chance of finding a compatible date for an enjoyable relationship.
Pursue Different Tactics
There are many more methods for how to find a date in today's society than there were just a few years ago. Don't be afraid to consider online dating, specialized dating services, or even speed dating as alternatives to asking people you already know to set you up. Many happy couples have met online or through unique circumstances, and their experiences have led to healthy relationships no matter how the initial date came to pass.
Follow Through With Offers
Once you find someone willing to try out a date, follow through by being considerate. Offer to visit their favorite restaurant, try out an activity they enjoy, or simply get to know them better. Even if the date is just for a one-time special occasion, it is important to realize that the two of you do indeed have a relationship, if only for the duration of the event. By truly making an effort during the date, you enhance the possibility of the relationship developing into something more rewarding that you first imagined.
Using Your Confidence to Get a Date
Finding a date can be an intimidating and seemingly impossible task, but approaching this with an open mind and clear intentions can make the act far easier. It is important to remember that the typical worst case scenario in asking out a friend or an acquaintance is that they may simply say "no." In such cases, you can brush off any potential awkwardness and move on gracefully. Understanding that the consequences of ascertaining a date are not terribly severe will allow you to navigate the social scene with a more confident and goal-oriented approach.