LoveToKnow Dating:AllComments

From LoveToKnow Dating

Comments

Hi Emma,

Your trust in his has been broken because of his cheating. It's difficult to overcome that violation of trust, but if you can do it, you can definitely have a relationship with him. If you can't, you won't be happy ever in the relationship. It's best to find someone you have complete faith in so you can have a happy relationship in which you won't wonder if you are being cheated on.

-- Contributed by: Marcelina Hardy

So i met my boyfriend over a year ago on facebook, we have been dating for almost 9 months, he's cheated on me once (from what i know) but i keep having a feeling he's not telling me something important, because of this gut feeling i've tried ending the relationship three times but each time he just convinces me not to because he always says that hes not keeping anything from me, i actually love him and alot too, i ended it once but i totally regretted it. Basically i dont know if i should end the relationship because of this gut feeling or not. Please Help.

-- Contributed by: Emma T

Thank you so much for your advice! :)

-- Contributed by: Afraid I'm going to loose him

HI Heather,

Well, it sounds as though he has lost trust in you when you spoke with him family after he told you not to. Trust is one of the most important qualities in a relationship. You can try to talk to him again and explain that you understand that you violated his trust and if there is anything you can do to prove to him that it won't happen again. Unfortunately, if he has lost total faith in you, there's not much more you can do if he's not willing to work on it. Just learn from your mistake and find someone who will trust and love you as much as you do him. I also want to add: this was a mistake on your part and we all make mistakes so don't beat yourself up over it. You've done what you can to help resolve the issue and now the ball is in his court.

-- Contributed by: Marcelina Hardy

My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 3 months..I met him through a get together with my mom friends. We have been together every weekend..for 3 months. I even stayed at his house for a week for the past couple of months. Everything was going good until he had issues with his family..and I confronted his family about it..and than he tells me that I shouldn't of said anything to them, because he said not to. Well ever since that day..He said he's been having mixed feelings..And he says that he is loosing hours at work..so he can't come down to see me every weekend now. I am not sure what to do..He is not talking to me as much as he normaly did..I already apologized several times about the family insident..Before I got with him..I just finished a 6 years relationship..As well as being in the hospital for 2 weeks. I really don't want to loose him..He's the best thing that happen to me! Any suggestions?

-- Contributed by: Afraid I'm going to loose him

hard and scary but we have to face the reality whatever the outcome of this relationship accept it as it was just charge to experienced.

-- Contributed by: boquet

I believe they can work as long as both parties involved work at it. Phone calls, texts and trying to visit as often as you can and when the time comes to move forward then it either will or wont happen. If you go into it and stress and worry over it, you will probably drive the other person way. I've just started a long distance relationship and I try to keep busy and think positive. Only time will tell. So if your in a long distance relationship, don't nag or stress the other one out. if they don't answer the phone or texts right away. Dont asume the worst! Good luck to everyone in your journey to finding everlasting love.

-- Contributed by: Colleen

Heartbrokengirl,

You sound desperate in your comment, which is most likely a reflection of how you are with him. If you push him to have a relationship with you, he will run the other way. It sounds like you two have a lot of issues in your relationship when you are indeed a couple and it makes me wonder how happy you truly are with him. Are you sure that you really love him or the idea of having a boyfriend? Breaking up with someone isn't easy and it sounds like you are going through the rough emotional stage right now. It's probably much more difficult on you because you talk to each other everyday and he does remind you repeatedly that he doesn't want to be with you. Who wants to hear that from anyone? You deserve someone you click with, treats you well and can work with you through issues in a relationship. My advice is to let this one go... Stop trying to get this relationship going again and find one that will make you much more happy and loved. Good luck to you.

-- Contributed by: Marcelina Hardy

Our situation is weird- We met 4 years ago locally, due to hurricane we have been apart since So here is our problem we are needing advice on, We meet in 2005 of May, June we slept with each other once or twice. We had a random conversation about him saying if he could he would sleep with others Just getting to know someone, to me this is a red flag saying he wants no commitment. At the end of June/July- a old friend of mine came in town and I slept with him (have not even talk to seen him since then). Of course I felt bad and was still talking to-getting to know my boyfriend now- . So I told him, I was honest. We fought about it then, saying I was wrong for doing it and I was cheated on him We stopped talking for a while and eventually we talked and been in this relationship status ever since. Now originally meeting my boyfriend, he told me he was separated and getting a divorce from his wife upfront. Within the last two years- we fight over everything accept problems that regard us. He always tells me I cheated on him (referring to the guy in the beginning) He says he tried to have a relationship with me and let it go but he cant. His wife cheated on him, (thats why there suppose to be divorcing) He compares her situation and his first girlfriend from 10 years ago (she cheated on him too) to me all the time. He says I am just like them. I do not think I cheated on him because we just met and still in the getting to know stage. He claims he really liked me, and I hurt him. In the last two years, he still talks to his first girlfriend- he even spent my birthday weekend with her once before. We have broken up, and he has told me to go hang out with other friends. I do and our next fight-he throws it in my face. I just hung out with them. We got in a huge fight before, and I ignored his phone call for a day and hung out with another friend and he assumes I slept with him too. I didnt. I have left my entire guy friends alone just to avoid arguments. He has recently started texting and talking to girls at his job, and I confronted him about confiding into them and we argue over that.

He has a son with his wife (4 years have passed and he not gotten a divorce) He lives with his wife because he says he cant afford to live alone (which is true, I know his salary) However, he was living his parents- his parents kicked them out and he decided without me that the best solution is to go buy a house for them instead of renting an apartment. He says he is living there with her because of his son and he does not want to have to make appointment to his son. His son is under 10 years of age... This bothers me A LOT. He wont even introduce me to his son because he says he is not ready for it. He sleeps in another room he says by himself as well. We fight, break up, I have told him a lot about my past relationships because he has asked. Every time I tell him though, he brings it up or questions it. He asks about my sex life with them all time. (These are people he has never met, seen or do not know) I have my faults as well of course. Jealous and threaten by his wife and first love. I get insecure. He says he loves me and I know I love him. A LOT! I have stuck by his side, but I just do understand why we fight so much. The bad part when asking each other why we are fighting we cannot even answer. I recently told him, I feel like he just uses me for sex. When he gets mad at me, he does not want to come see me. I have ask him to come see me once every 2 months. He does work with 4 days on and 3 days off. He travels for his job. He tells me he does not have time to come see me because he has stuff to do at home and needs to hang out with son and says I am selfish. He makes me feel like I am asking for the world and I end up feeling bad but really it is not a lot. Right now, he says he is mad at me and does not want to see me and does not know when he will be ready to me. I always feel like I am last on his list, but he says I am not.. What do you think? Does this mean we are not meant to be together or what? I really do love him.. I really do.. no matter how mad or hurt or how long I have been crying. He can tell me right now and I would be with him. We still talk every day, trying to be friends. But it hurts a lot when he tells me he does not want to be with me because of all the fighting we do. I want to work on it, he says no This advice is for both.. are we both crazy? Should we try?.... we are so confused.

-- Contributed by: Heartbrokengirl

Bell,

When you say you don't have the guts, is it because you don't want to break his heart or you don't want it to be over? It doesn't sound like you two have much of relationship, so breaking it off won't be a major change and it would allow you to re-focus your emotions in a different direction.

These articles might help you too:

-- Contributed by: Debbie Vasen

me and my boy friend have known eacother for about a year but have just started dating like a week or two ago.. at first it was working out perfectley.. but now a week later hes starting to act different. we can only talk by phone or txting.. we've never talked on the phone and can only txt when one of my friends are over who has a phone since i dont have one.. and to top that off we only see eachother 3 times a year. at first i didnt mind because we txted alot and had great conversations.. but now he sometimes doesnt txt me back and if he does thier only one word answers. sometimes hes not careful what he says and that bothers me.. just today i txted him and of course he dint txt back.. so i said well we'll txt later since ur busy. 30 seconds later he'll reply ok like hes been sitting there doing nothing. then i told him i was going away and wouldnt be able to 'talk' to him for a few days.. all he said to that was well then ill talk to then.. not even a why or ill miss you.. i dont know what happened or if hes seriously busy..but i dont know if i can keep up with it. my frinds see it to and tell me i can find someone better but i dont think i have the guts to tell him its over.

-- Contributed by: bell

Hi Jessica,

Have you talked to him about how you feel? If you have and he isn't making any changes in the way he is dealing with this long distance relationship, you may want to start thinking about moving on. If you haven't talked to him, you may want to just mention that you have been feeling that he has become distant and would like to know if something is bothering him. Communication and trust is so important in a long distance relationship, if you don't have those two things, a long distance relationship will most likely not succeed. Good luck to you. If you need any other help, you might want to check out our Dating forums!!

-- Contributed by: Marcelina Hardy

This may sound really bad, but in August I started dating my friends ex-boyfriend. Him and I were best friends before we started dating. I fell in love with him immediately but in november he had to move to florida to live with his grandmother and ive only gotten to see him twice since we have started this lond distance relationship verything was okay at first but now i cant ever get him to call me no matter how many times i ask him, i feel like he never want to talk to me,hes a great guy but i feel like if i was his ex he would call me all the time!ive got a couple of weeks until i get to see him but im not sure if i should break up with him or just see it through

-- Contributed by: Jessica

Rose,

His behavior is bothering you and putting a strain on your relationship. If he isn't taking your feelings into consideration and isn't open to making more of an effort for the relationship, you may have to think about breaking things off. I know it's not what you want to hear but long distance relationships are a lot of work from BOTH.

-- Contributed by: Marcelina Hardy

I have been dating a guy for over a year. everything was great we had so many plans which included to move in together. Everything changed once he took a job in another state. AT first he would call, text and email me all the time, now he seems very indifferent doesn't call as often and rarely answers his phone when I call. I approached him about this however he acted as nothing was up. What should I do.

-- Contributed by: rose

James,

Whether you should pursue a relationship with her is completely up to you and your online friend. Long distance relationships are difficult but manageable. The first step would be to meet in person, if you are both comfortable with that, you can then see where your relationship goes from there. Good luck!

-- Contributed by: Marcelina Hardy

Alright, recently I have been on a social service on my playstation 3 called "Home". Home is a place where u create your own avitar and you enter into a community of other gamers/people. I have been talking to this one girl now for over a month and I've become extremely fond of her. I have no idea if I should persue a relationship out of it or not, but I have told her that I like her and she has told me that she likes me as well. I live in Florida and she lives out in L.A. Should I try to keep it friendly or should I try to make something more out of it?

-- Contributed by: james

I have been seeing this guy for 11 months now and we only just started getting really serious 1.5 months before he had to leave for a six month holiday over in canada, i met his dad when he took me for a weekend to his home town 2 moths before he left and then 2 weeks before he had to leave i was invited to dinner and met his mum, we have said we love eachother and he sends me an email everytime he is online,so i get one maybe every second day,although the one thing that i'm un aware about is what is going to happen when he gets back,we are acting like we are still a couple but future talk has arised in any conversations, i wrote him a letter to read while on the plane, it basically said that i want to remain his girlfriend when he gets back i want to be serious with him, and if he wants that i hope he comes and finds me, he hasn't bought it up at all, and the other night we were talking on msn chat and after about 1/2 n hour he said he has to go his credit is going to run out but then 1/2 hour later he was still online, now i felt a little hurt because all i wanted to do was talk to him but it feels like he's not missing me as much as i am him and maybe i should back off a bit, i send him about 2 emails a day,sometimes three, he asked me to keep the emails coming so thats what im doing, although after the other night i have not emailed him, im going crazy thinking...can you please help me?

-- Contributed by: jaide

Hi April, Have you checked out our section Advice on Online Relationship? You can also check out these articles for ideas:

-- Contributed by: Marcelina Hardy

My boyfriend and I have been dating online for a year and a couple months but we recently got into a agruement and I know it wouldn't have happened if we were face to face but were suppose to meet up in may of 2009. I was wondering what are some romantic things I can do to show him I care about him and that this could work.Besides the little romantic quotes and things like that. I love to send him something but I dont think guys appreciate flowers the way girls do so any ideas?

-- Contributed by: April

well i met this guy in my holiday to south america. well i met him in this market and my friends claimed that he was looking at me alot. so cos he speaks english and i do we stared speaking. and then he gave me his e-mail address and invited me to come and see him when i have time. but we have been speaking but i don't know if he was interested in me

-- Contributed by: estefania tapia
> Return to article