Taking a Break From Dating

by LoriGorshow on October 31, 2009

I have known men and women who have been so hurt by a breakup or divorce that they have avoided getting into another relationship for years, sometimes decades. Then there are the people like me, who when a relationship ends we think about dating again….as in right now! While it may be a good idea to ‘pick yourself up, dust yourself off and get back in the saddle again’ doing so too soon can have you repeating the same relationship mistakes over and over and over again.

If you find your self saying, “She or he is just like all the other men or women I’ve dated,” you need to take a look in the mirror. The problem is not them, it’s you. You are the one choosing who to date. One reason you might be picking the same ‘type’ of person is because there is a familiarity about them. Not a conscious familiarity but an unconscious one. Another sign you’re picking the same type of person, the new relationship seems to take off like a firecracker or you find your self saying, “I feel like we have known each other all our lives.”

One way to get away from choosing the same old, same old, is to spend some time by your self. This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t go out socially. Spending time by your self means that you avoid dating someone new, instead focus your time and attention on friends, family and your independence. Then when you do ‘get back in the saddle’ you start with a new perspective.

I’d like to hear from you. How have you broken the habit of choosing the wrong partner?

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