Why Online Dating Doesn't Work
From LoveToKnow Dating
The reasons why online dating doesn't work are complex. Many variables come into play that you do not have in "real life" dating, which makes getting to know someone and continuing the relationship more difficult. If you just started an online romance, one of the best ways to overcome the obstacles in online love affairs includes knowing what they are and working through them.
The Reasons Why Online Dating Doesn't Work
The following are some of the most common reasons why online dating doesn't work. If you are having problems with making your Internet relationships last, find out what you can do the next time you start dating someone.
It Takes Work
Relationships take work but Internet ones take even more work. If you have a busy lifestyle, you may find it hard to keep up with the demands of online dating. Internet dating means you have to set time aside to chat or the relationship will fizzle out.
The best way to find the time to keep an Internet relationship going is make an effort. This means even if you only have five minutes, you can send a quick e-mail, romantic e-card or instant message just to let the person know you are thinking about him or her. It's important to keep the person close to you even if you are busy.
Is the Longing You Feel Worth It?
You long to be with your Internet boyfriend or girlfriend but since he or she lives hundreds of even thousands of miles away, you know it's just not possible. After some time, this longing takes over and you start to resent your online fling.
Long distance relationships are tough and especially for people who have always been apart. The best way to help this is to talk about it with your significant other and see if there is another way for you two to meet. You could cut the cost of travel in half or meet half way.
Where is this Relationship Going?
You will find that many people who date online want to keep it on the Internet. This may be due to not feeling confident and fearing that the person will not like him or her. The problem with this is how long are you willing to stay in a relationship with someone who may never want to meet you?
You might have to give your significant other an ultimatum. If your he or she doesn't seem as excited about meeting you in person and furthering the relationship, it may be time to say goodbye.
Is the Person Cheating on Me?
The downside of meeting someone on the Internet is that it is possible for him or her to be chatting with other people. Even if you have been dating this person for a while, he or she may be tempted to stray. The Internet has made it easy for people to cheat emotionally. All you can do is trust the person until he or she gives you a reason not to believe in his or her faithfulness.
You Don't Like the Person in Real Life
Your online date is great to chat with on the Internet but when you meet the person in real life, you can't stand him or her. It's not that the person lied to you, it's just that maybe the person talks too much or doesn't look as attractive as in the picture.
If this happens, you may feel discouraged because you just wasted a month or more talking to someone you don't want to be with for more than a few minutes. Unfortunately, this is one of the downsides of dating online; sometimes people are not what they seem to be and you just have to move on.
It Gets Old Quickly
Night after night, you log onto your computer and talk with your online date for hours. At first, this is exciting and you wait all day for the time you get to sign onto the Internet. However, after a few months, it's not as exciting and you are bored.
Having the same type of interactions with someone over time can cause the relationship to end. The best way to keep it alive is to find other ways to make it new and exciting. Try scheduling time to get together or chat on the phone rather than via e-mail or instant messenger.
Conclusion
Don't let the reasons why Internet dating doesn't work disappoint you. Many people meet their soul mate on the Internet every day. The most important things to remember are that, like any relationship, it takes commitment, trust and work to make it last. Keep an open mind, open heart and soon you will find the person of your dreams..
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Comments
Online dating cant work because guys are initially attracted to appearance and looks and girls are attracted to the mens behaviours and vibe. Girls need time to decide is they like the guy. Guys can decide right of the bat. Girls are turned on like a volume knob. Guys are turned on like a light switch.
-- Contributed by: bobThank you for your interesting comment!
-- Contributed by: Marcelina HardyOnline dating doesn't work because most women don't use it as a place to actually meet men. They instead use online dating as a way to reinforce their notions that "there are no good men to date" and that they are single because of that, not because of anything they're doing wrong. Women will setup a profile, use it to contact ONLY the tallest and hottest guys they can find, then when they have no luck with them (or find out that tall and hot guys are often jerks), they give up. That allows them to continually delude themselves that their single status is NOT their fault.
-- Contributed by: short ugly guy
This page has been accessed 2,971 times. This page was last modified 22:54, 15 July 2009.
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