Married Women Who Cheat

Relationships with Married Women Who Cheat

You can actually have one. You may have to go through counseling, but if you're both willing to work hard on your relationship—that means she wants to stop having an affair or affairs—love can really conquer all. Understand the whys, the how's, and the solutions.

Web MD says that one in five married women has an affair. Shocking, isn’t it? More and more women are feeling that it's okay to act on their sexual urges. It doesn't mean that one out of five relationships is doomed. It just means they need constant maintenance in the form of communication with each other and perhaps a therapist.

Why They Do It

According to this article, there are a few reasons women may turn to another partner:

• Your relationship lacks romance that she craves, so she's looking for emotional support from the outside.
• Her partner is too focused on sex. She's not getting enough talking, cuddling, and just "being together" time.
• You're going through a tough time in your relationship. It may be boring. When you're not satisfied in your marriage, instead of pulling together to solve the problem, the two of you may decide to pull away from each other. In comes the new partner she confides in and the affair "just happens."

The Web MD article mentioned earlier lists a few additional reasons, which still basically boil down to women not getting what they want out of their marriages. However, here are some extra nudges in the wrong direction:

• Women wait longer overall to have children, so there's no feeling of "cheating on the kids." The only commitment she has is to her spouse.
• Television and movies have made women feel freer to pursue their sexual urges. Look at the scandal on Sex and the City. The women weren't married, but they slept with whomever they wanted to with no façade of prudishness to even try to hide behind.
• Women are outside of the house more than they used to be, which means they meet more people at work, at the gym, and again, online (though that doesn't qualify as out of the house, they're still socializing).

And again, it's just so darn easy to cheat these days between the Internet and more and more women in the workforce.

Why It's So Easy

Cheating is easier than ever before, so married women who cheat have no problems finding partners in crime. They can pick up new lovers online in chat rooms, on actual dating sites (some allow you to even check the "married" box and let everyone know exactly what their marital status is!). Then, of course, there are the normal meeting places—bars, the grocery store, work, and so on. The opportunities are endless for women who want to have a fling on the side.

Is She Or Isn't She?

Sometimes it's not so obvious if your woman is cheating. The article from above also lists a few signs that she could be cheating:

• No communication at home.
• No sex, either.
• She has a new close male friend.
• She works a lot more hours lately, leaving early and/or staying late.

In a lot of cases, you can just listen to your gut. If something seems "not quite right" you should discuss it with her. Try not to come off as the jealous, paranoid jerk (she'll respond better!). If you suspect she's using an online dating service to find her new partners and you prefer to catch her in the act, here are a few to check:

• Married Date Online
• Lonely Cheating Wives

Then there are the more open dating websites like MySpace, Yahoo! Personals, Match.com, etc.

Making It Work

Your best bet is counseling if you want to work it out with your cheating woman. Find a marriage and family therapist in your area that you both like. The therapy won't be effective if one of you feels alienated, as if the therapist is accusatory or taking sides. If you don't know anyone who can refer you to a therapist, start with the Yellow Pages and work from there. You may even be able to get a good referral from your doctor or your minister. Other options for finding a therapist are:

• Find-a-Therapist
• American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy